Maintaining A Long Distance Relationship – Dealing With The Questions & Problems
I spent the entire day planning the perfect date for Amy’s return.
I hired a limo to pick her up from the airport.
I would sit at the back waiting for her with a bunch of roses.
Then the driver would take us to the finest restaurant in town, where I had already booked a table.
It would be perfect.
But when her flight arrived, she wasn’t on it.
After an hour of waiting, I sent Amy a text and told the driver to take me home.
She didn’t text back that day. I called her that night. No answer.
The next day she sent me a message:
“Hi. I’m back in town. I took a later flight”
That was it.
No mention of how much she missed me. No mention of the date night she flaked on.
I thought a big date night could save our long-distance relationship.
I was wrong.
Table of Contents
- Maintaining A Long Distance Relationship – Dealing With The Questions & Problems
- The Problem With Long Distance Relationships (And Why They Don’t Work)
- How To Make A Long Distance Relationship Work?
- How To Maintain (And Save!) A Long Distance Relationship With Your Girlfriend
- How To Save A Relationship With Fractionation
The Problem With Long Distance Relationships (And Why They Don’t Work)
The above is an excerpt from an email I got from a client. Let’s call him “Nick”. And Nick wanted advice on how to make a long distance relationship work.
And to save you the suspense, Nick sorted everything out in the end after he did this one thing I told him to do.
But before I share that one thing with you, let me explain a bit about long distance relationships.
Many LDR’s (long distance relationships) start when you meet someone while traveling.
Or you meet someone in your hometown. It starts as a regular relationship but then either you move, or your partner does.
Are you relating to what I’m saying so far?
You both knew that the LDR was a short-term agreement.
But here’s the thing…
Deep down, you realize that a long-distance relationship is less than ideal.
You’re also wise enough to know that life is messy and unpredictable.
College, career opportunities, and sick family members pull us away from our partners.
In the beginning, you agreed to be faithful.
You agreed to keep in regular contact.
You agreed to work hard to stay together.
You both promised to call every night, Skype or Facetime every week, and meet in person once per month.
And in the beginning, it worked.
After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?
Yes, it does…
…to a point.
After that point, she started to drift away. She seemed to be losing interest. You tried to fix things but the more you pushed the more she moved away.
Then you became paranoid that she had met someone else.
By that time you’ve realized that:
- You need to do something drastic to save your long-distance relationship, and
- You need to try a different approach.
After all…
“If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always gotten.”
How To Make A Long Distance Relationship Work?
So, what’s the answer?
Mainstream dating advice tells you to “put in the work” to make the relationship last.
Like sending frequent text messages and loving gifts to her place, right?
How has that worked so far?
Or you could turn to the “Pickup Artist” community.
Here’s what a typical “Pickup Artist” goo-roo will tell you:
“Fuck that long distance crap, bro. Go pick up more girls. Use these pickup lines!”
Yeah, right.
Make no mistake… Pickup Artist tricks might just help you catch that hottie’s attention at the club…
… you know, that same party slut who has been banging every guy who buys her Tequilas every Saturday night.
Is that what you really want? No, right?
And let’s face it… Pickup Artist and conventional “Dating Guru” tricks are for chumps.
You need something more.
How To Maintain (And Save!) A Long Distance Relationship With Your Girlfriend
To maintain a long distance relationship with your girlfriend and make it work, you’ll need to do one thing:
Manipulate her mind.
Now, before we get into the nitty gritty, understand this –
What I’m going to show you next isn’t for the faint-hearted.
If anything, you’ll need balls of steel to make what I recommend work.
Will it work for you? Maybe, and maybe not.
However, if you’re desperate to make it work out for you, then you’ll WANT to give this a worthy shot.
The stakes are high if your relationship is already in trouble. And you need to bring out the heavy artillery to save this relationship.
Next, I’m going to give you the “Big Gun” you can use to salvage your long distance relationship right now. This is how to keep a woman interested in you (even when she’s not physically present with you all the time).
I’m going to walk you through a 4-step strategy taken straight from the Shogun Method.
(By the way, if you want an easy relationship on your terms, take a look at the entire Shogun Method program. It’s like a Ph.D. in long-term relationship/marriage game. If you want a submissive girlfriend who is obedient and loyal, this is how.)
But for now, you need a strategy you can use TODAY. And so here it is…
Step 1: Fake A Break Up
No joke, this is one fucking ballsy move.
You see, your relationship was slipping away from you. It was almost at the point of no return so you need to jolt it back to life.
A fake breakup will make things emotional. And that’s what we want. The fire between you was dying through lack of contact, so we need to throw water on that fire to get it roaring again.
The fake break-up works because human beings are wired to prevent loss rather than seek gain.
Or in other words: we will work harder to keep what we have.
Also, what we don’t have becomes more valuable to us. When you’re not hers anymore, you’ll instantly raise your value.
Here’s the cold, hard truth:
If your LDR was waning, she was thinking of breaking up with you. Women have many more options than men will ever realize.
Don’t fool yourself into thinking that she’s going to be loyal to you.
And you know what? By coming up with the idea of you wanting to break up with her (even if it’s fake) you take the initiative and beat her to the punch.
The fake breakup will trigger feelings of scarcity in her mind.
So this is what you need to do:
Suggest a soft breakup and urge her to meet other guys.
This will confuse the shit out of her. She’ll think: surely he should be fighting for me so some other guy doesn’t steal me?
Run her through a ringer of emotions:
- Confused that you would be comfortable with other men pursuing her…
- Anxious that she will lose you…
- Fearful that you may have met someone else…
And this, my friend, is exactly what we want.
We are priming her. Remember:
Women are much easier to manipulate when they are emotional.
Now you’ve got her where you want her, on to step 2.
Step 2: Let It Boil Over
If step 1 required audacity, step 2 will test your willpower.
You need to refrain from contacting her for a couple of days so her head can spin and her emotions can overflow.
This is where you need to exercise self-discipline! Let her cry, scream and plead to see you. Stay cold and insist that you need some space.
So to sum up, what should you do in step 2?
Answer: nothing. If you do nothing but lie in bed for 2 days and don’t look at your phone, you’ll have succeeded.
Step 3: Play The Reluctant Buyer
Push her to the brink but be aware of her limits. You don’t want her to move past pain into acceptance.
Agree to her request for a meeting. Important: do this while she’s still emotional, but before she begins to accept the end of the relationship.
(By the way, it’s important that you meet in person. The tactics and script that I’m about to give must be delivered face-to-face.)
Even if you have to travel to see her for this meeting, don’t worry – you only have to do this once.
Enslaving her, if you do it right, is like a light switch – you flip it once and it’s done.
In a moment I’ll tell you what to do and say in this meeting.
But first, let me explain why we are doing all this.
You might think staging a fake break up and making up again is a lot of emotional stress and work.
You’re right. But like unlearning bad habits you have to get worse before you get better.
It’s like the engineer who takes the machine apart and puts it back together again to learn how it works. You have to break your relationship to build it back up.
Your long-distance relationship was dying a slow death, so you need to inject emotions back into it. Yes, they are negative emotions – fear, pain, heartache, jealousy, etc.
But remember: love and hate are two sides of the same coin. The real “opposite” of love is indifference, not hate.
Fair enough?
OK, now on to the final step…
Step 4: Use Fractionation On Her
Huh?
What is Fractionation?
We cover Fractionation exhaustively in the Shogun Method course, but I’ll explain it briefly here.
Fractionation is an underground hypnosis technique. It’s underground because of one reason: those who know it don’t want others to know it.
Simple as that.
Indeed, there are many who fear its power. They consider it unethical and evil. Others know how effective it is but don’t want it falling into the wrong hands.
No exaggeration.
And get this –
We only teach Fractionation to a select number of students. Why? Because of these two reasons –
- It’s a complex technique (not a shortcut or magic bullet!)
- It’s unfair to hurt women
OK, but what is it?
How To Save A Relationship With Fractionation
Let me explain using an analogy.
Over 90% of men watch porn. And the 10% who don’t are liars.
But what is the female equal of porn?
Romance novels and soap operas.
Think about it. Women cannot help but not get sucked into that stuff.
We as men might think they’re a waste of time, but that’s because our minds work differently.
But how many women do you know are addicted to this stuff? Shitloads of them, right?
And you know what?
Soap operas and romance novels use Fractionation to hook women.
Now you can use the same technique to get your woman addicted to you and not Harlequin romance novels.
Simply stated, Fractionation is a mix of the below:
- Hypnosis
- Storytelling
- Persuasion
- Psychological Manipulation
- Body language
Remember I said you must meet with your girl in person to Fractionate her? It’s because body language is a huge key to making the technique work.
Again, I don’t have space to teach the basics of Fractionation here. So, I’ve put together a free Online Masterclass.
If you want to learn the basics of Fractionation, click on the link below.
Online Masterclass (Request Invitation)
Enter your email on the page that comes up. Then, wait for the email invite to arrive in your inbox.
Watch, learn, absorb, take notes, and get ready for your love life to change…forever!
Live, laugh, and love.
P.S. Remember, follow the principles of the Shogun Method to keep the relationship alive. You let it slip away once and you almost lost her.
Don’t let it happen again.
P.P.S. Did “Nick” get his girlfriend back?
He sure did. He followed the steps I’ve laid out in this article TO THE LETTER.
And guess what happened? Amy now travels to visit him twice a month and is planning to move back to be with Nick. They’re as solid as a rock!
Ross says
Derek, this seems pretty straight-forward, there is only two things I don’t understand;
How do you urge a soft-break up over long distance, text her do it over the phone? And how would I get her on the phone?
Also How would one initiate step 3 – when travel to the country is banned?
Ross says
As in during the current 2020 crisis, all travel is banned, it’s what caused the whole slipping away in the first place.