From Thomas Elliot (via email)
Is there a way to bring a calm to this storm? I’m giving her space but I’m afraid I may lose her.
Derek Rake :
Thomas,
You won’t lose her simply by cutting off your contact with her. Go cold on her for at least 7 days and wait for her to call you.
Then let me know. 🙂
Thomas :
I really messed up, though, so bad it looks like I cheated even though I didn’t.
Derek Rake :
Follow the program. 🙂
Thomas :
Ok, 7 days. One last thing if she doesn’t call?
Derek Rake :
Then let me know.
Thomas :
This has been a long seven days crazy thing about my situation. It has been two months since we actually broke up. I’m just ready for this to be over and us moving forward together. Please, teach me how to make her miss me.
Day 8 – Just wondering where do I go from here. We talked because someone tried to break in her house so I stayed a couple of nights. Lets me know that she really still does have feelings for me. Even though she wouldn’t let me touch or kiss her while we were in bed or when I left. I’m confident that there’s a chance. I hate rejection and I need help so that I do the right thing.
Derek Rake :
She’s baiting you when she says that she has got feelings for you still. It’s important for you to see this clearly as it is! The fact that she doesn’t let you get physical with her should ring your alarm bells.
If you’re familiar with the Shogun Method (particularly the IRAE Model) – it looks like you’ll need to start right in the Intrigue stage, and then slowly rebuild Rapport.
Thomas :
Ok I’m stupid I got the call and we talked even got to stay over. Out at the bar, I see one of her friends who starts a conversation and gives me hints that they talk about our relationship. She hates me to talk about it but she does. Anyway, the friends go back and tell everything now she wants nothing to do with me. She even wants the garage door opener back and I’m back to square one. I really want my life with her back on track.
Derek Rake :
Being reactionary is quite counterproductive. Remember the three principles of the Dark Triad: narcissism, Machiavellian-ism and psychopathy. What would a Dark Triad man do?
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