{"id":5321,"date":"2017-12-25T08:06:00","date_gmt":"2017-12-25T00:06:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/?p=5321"},"modified":"2018-06-26T16:37:54","modified_gmt":"2018-06-26T08:37:54","slug":"how-to-regain-someones-trust","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/how-to-regain-someones-trust\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Rebuild Trust In A Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"<h2>Steps To Rebuilding Trust In A Relationship<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Ever got cheated on by your current wife or girlfriend?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Truly, it\u2019s one of the most painful things a guy could ever experience.<\/p>\n<p>You love a woman, treat her well, work hard to meet her every need&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>&#8230;but in the end, she betrays your trust by sleeping with another man.<\/p>\n<p>Frankly, it\u2019s beyond heartbreaking.<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/nJ84YkmcsUo\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n\n<h2><strong>How To Rebuild Trust After Being Lied To (And Cheated On)<\/strong><\/h2>\n<h3><strong>Lenny&#8217;s Story<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><strong>Being cheated on was the problem of a good number of <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Shogun Method<\/a> clients.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>They all came to me for help, asking me for the right thing to do next.<\/p>\n<p>And one of them was Lenny. Here&#8217;s his story&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>For more than 25 years, he busted his ass for his wife and kids.<\/p>\n<p>He had put in 12-hour shifts to put his kids through college and his wife, Fiona, through drama school. He worked hard. Real hard.<\/p>\n<p>He (rightly) thought he was doing things right&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>&#8230;until he received a naughty text from Fiona that was intended for another man.<\/em> <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>To his tremendous shock, it turned out to be a text for a young actor she was having a secret affair with.<\/p>\n<p>Fiona immediately came clean and confessed, but the damage had been done&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>While Lenny accepted her back, he was so hurt and confused that he came to me for advice.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI hate what she did,\u201d Lenny sobbed to me.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cShe has already apologized and promised to call off the affair. But I don\u2019t trust her anymore. I can\u2019t trust her. Is she the bad one here, or is it me?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMaybe it\u2019s my fault,\u201d Lenny continued. \u201cMaybe I didn\u2019t work hard enough. Maybe I didn\u2019t treat her well enough. Is it wrong for me not to trust her anymore? What should I do, Derek?\u201d<\/p>\n<div class=\"su-note\"  style=\"border-color:#cb3b34;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><div class=\"su-note-inner su-u-clearfix su-u-trim\" style=\"background-color:#e5554e;border-color:#ffffff;color:#fff;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><strong>READ ALSO: <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/how-to-save-a-marriage\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">How To Save A Marriage<\/a><\/strong><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><strong>It&#8217;s Not Your Fault<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><strong>If you feel the same way about YOUR relationship, then I\u2019ll tell you what I told Lenny that day:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s <u>NOT<\/u> your fault,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s human nature to feel distrustful of those who deceive you. It\u2019s <a href=\"https:\/\/www.psychologicalscience.org\/observer\/why-love-literally-hurts\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">biological<\/a>. We can\u2019t help it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And then I snapped him back to reality.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut trust <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><strong>IS<\/strong><\/span> essential in any relationship,\u201d I told him.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIf you want to keep her and save your relationship, <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">you WILL need to rebuild the trust<\/span>.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>&#8220;Without trust, your relationship will fail in the end, even if she never cheats on you again.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Lenny shook his head.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut how can I trust her again, Derek? It sounds impossible.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I smiled and told him: <strong>\u201cNot if you build the <u>RIGHT<\/u> kind of trust.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat do you mean?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLet me show you the ONLY way to rebuild trust in a broken relationship&#8230;\u201d<\/p>\n<h2><strong>How To Rebuild Trust In A Relationship<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>First, let\u2019s start with the bad news&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Once a cheater, always a cheater.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>If your wife or girlfriend cheated on you before, <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/how-to-catch-your-girlfriend-cheating\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">chances are she\u2019ll cheat on you again<\/a>. Sorry man, but that&#8217;s the <em>truth<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>And the only way to rebuild trust in a relationship that\u2019s been marred by infidelity&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>&#8230;is to simply make sure she <em>NEVER<\/em> cheats on you again.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Before you say, <em>\u201cBut Derek, that\u2019s not trust!\u201d, <\/em>let me give you Lesson #1 for this article&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Lesson #1 is this:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Not all kinds of trust are the same.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>In fact, there are three \u201clevels\u201d of trust in human relationships:<\/p>\n<div class=\"su-note\"  style=\"border-color:#cb3b34;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><div class=\"su-note-inner su-u-clearfix su-u-trim\" style=\"background-color:#e5554e;border-color:#ffffff;color:#fff;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><strong>READ ALSO: <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/broken-heart-symptoms\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">How To Mend A Broken Heart<\/a><\/strong><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><strong>#1: The \u201cInstitution\u201d level of trust.<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>This is the most basic kind of trust, and it\u2019s enforced by rules, social norms, and expectations.<\/p>\n<p>For example: The basic trust between couples. They \u201ctrust\u201d each other to follow the rules and norms for exclusive relationships.<\/p>\n<h3><strong>#2: The \u201cRecognition\u201d level of trust.\u00a0<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>This is a stronger form of trust than the \u201cinstitution\u201d level. \u201cRecognition\u201d means you trust someone because you\u2019ve seen their character and track record.<\/p>\n<p>For example: Over the years, you and your wife have proven to be loyal to each other. Then you share a \u201crecognition\u201d level of trust, and it\u2019s stronger than marriage vows or societal pressure.<\/p>\n<p>And thirdly:<\/p>\n<h3><strong>#3: The \u201cSubmission\u201d level of trust.\u00a0<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>This is the strongest form of trust of all. It\u2019s when you totally, completely trust a person, regardless of what they say or do.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s a form of <strong>\u201cEmotional Enslavement,\u201d<\/strong> you could say. And it\u2019s more common than you think.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSubmission\u201d or \u201cEmotional Enslavement\u201d isn\u2019t just found in strong relationships. It also exists between:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><em>The makers of a popular TV show and its rabid fans<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Famous celebrities and their avid followers<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Powerful politicians and their die-hard supporters<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Successful commercial brands and their loyal buyers<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Influential religions and their faithful adherents<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>If you\u2019ve ever been emotionally \u201caddicted\u201d to a TV show, video game, beer, person, etc&#8230; then you know how it is!<\/p>\n<h2><strong>Rebuilding Trust With Emotional Enslavement<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><strong>To know how to rebuild trust in a relationship, first, know this:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The most stable relationships have the first two levels of trust present.<\/p>\n<p>For example, in a marriage,<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>The<strong> \u201cInstitution\u201d<\/strong> trust comes in the form of marriage vows, laws, and social pressure<\/li>\n<li>The <strong>\u201cRecognition\u201d<\/strong> trust comes from the rapport the couple shares<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Here&#8217;s the kicker&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Very <em>few <\/em>couples have the \u201cSubmission\u201d level of trust, though. The reason for this is simple. There\u2019s something about \u201ctotal surrender\u201d that creeps people out&#8230; and yet, that&#8217;s the key to <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/understanding-relationships\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">understanding relationships<\/a> that most guys completely miss.<\/p>\n<p>So, most couples hold their relationships together by following the rules (&#8220;<strong><em>Institution<\/em><\/strong>&#8220;) and relying on each other (&#8220;<strong><em>Recognition<\/em><\/strong>&#8220;).<\/p>\n<p><strong>Here\u2019s the problem with this situation&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When your wife or girlfriend cheats on you, then both kinds of trust go flying out the window:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><em>Firstly, she broke the \u201cInstitution\u201d level of trust by breaking her promises to you<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Secondly, she broke the \u201cRecognition\u201d level of trust because she\u2019s not as trustworthy as you thought, after all<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>So to rebuild trust in a relationship, you can\u2019t rely on the first two levels of trust. Makes sense, right?<\/p>\n<p>This means that you can only turn to the third level of trust: Submission. <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><strong>Emotional Enslavement<\/strong><\/span>.<\/p>\n<p>Let me say it in plain language:<\/p>\n<p>If you want to save the relationship and keep her from cheating on you again&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>&#8230;you must ENSLAVE her emotionally to you.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When you establish the most powerful level of trust in your relationship, then the other two levels won\u2019t matter.<\/p>\n<p>If she\u2019s emotionally addicted to you&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>If she completely submits to you&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>If she\u2019s totally ENSLAVED to you&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>&#8230;then she\u2019ll never ever want to hurt you again.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>How does that sound to you?<\/p>\n<div class=\"su-note\"  style=\"border-color:#cb3b34;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><div class=\"su-note-inner su-u-clearfix su-u-trim\" style=\"background-color:#e5554e;border-color:#ffffff;color:#fff;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><strong>READ ALSO: <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/signs-your-marriage-is-failing\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">How To Know When Your Marriage Is Over<\/a><\/strong><\/div><\/div>\n<h2><strong>How To Enslave Your Girlfriend Or Wife<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><strong>By the way, \u201cEnslavement\u201d is not the same as \u201cseduction.\u201d Enslavement is on a totally different level.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s like this&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>In Shogun Method, I teach this core idea:<\/p>\n<p>Every relationship that a guy has with women will go through <em><strong>four<\/strong> <\/em>stages:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>The <strong>Intrigue <\/strong>stage, where she first gets interested in you<\/li>\n<li>The <strong>Rapport <\/strong>stage, where she gets to know you better (and builds \u201cRecognition\u201d trust)<\/li>\n<li>The <strong>Attraction <\/strong>stage, where she gets romantically attracted to you<\/li>\n<li>The <strong>Enslavement <\/strong>stage, where she gets emotionally addicted to you for life. This is only achievable by building \u201csubmission-level\u201d trust.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p><em>(Inside Shogun Method, this is known as the &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/stages-of-love\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">stages of love<\/a>&#8221; theory, or the IRAE Model &#8211; Intrigue\/Rapport\/Attract\/Enslave.)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-5689\" src=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/rebuilding-trust-quotes.jpg\" alt=\"How to rebuild trust using the IRAE Model\" width=\"700\" height=\"587\" srcset=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/rebuilding-trust-quotes.jpg 700w, https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/rebuilding-trust-quotes-300x252.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 700px) 100vw, 700px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Most mainstream &#8220;Pickup Artist&#8221; advice can take you up to the Attraction stage. It can teach you <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/how-to-seduce-women\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">how to seduce women<\/a>, but that\u2019s it.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s the reason why most \u201cPickup Artists\u201d end up alone and miserable in the end. None of the ladies they seduce ever feel emotionally attached to them for long.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Shogun Method is different.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I teach guys how to reach the <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Enslavement<\/span> stage. It\u2019s where you build the kind of relationship with a woman that endures ups-and-downs, time and time again. If you want to know <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/how-to-make-a-relationship-stronger\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">how to make a relationship last<\/a>, then you must learn Enslavement.<\/p>\n<p>So, here&#8217;s the deal&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>If your wife or girlfriend has cheated on you, but you want to save the relationship&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>&#8230;then you only need to work on the last stage: <strong><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">Enslavement<\/span>.<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2><strong>Two Enslavement Techniques You Can Use Today<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><strong>Now, there are many Shogun Method techniques you can use to emotionally enslave your woman&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>(If you already have access to the program, go to Module 7).<\/p>\n<p>In this guide, I\u2019ll share with you the same two techniques that I taught Lenny to get his wife Fiona back in line.<\/p>\n<h3><strong>Enslavement Technique #1: Emotional Blackmail<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>Ever experienced your woman telling you: <em>\u201cIf you loved me, you\u2019d (something she wants you to do)\u201d<\/em>?<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s <strong>emotional blackmail<\/strong> in its purest form. And guess what? <em>Two can play that game<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>Since your woman cheated on you, you have two advantages over her:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>She knows she owes you, and<\/li>\n<li>If she doesn\u2019t do what you want, she\u2019ll look even worse<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Lenny started with small bits of emotional blackmail, like:<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><em>\u201cIf you don\u2019t transfer to a different acting school, I\u2019ll stop funding your studies.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>&#8230;and as the weeks went by, he slowly kept ramping up the blackmail:<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><em>\u201cI\u2019m going to be happy, with or without you.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Lenny carefully chose the kinds of emotional blackmail that Fiona would comply with. The more she complied with what he wanted, the more submissive she became.<\/p>\n<div class=\"su-note\"  style=\"border-color:#cb3b34;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><div class=\"su-note-inner su-u-clearfix su-u-trim\" style=\"background-color:#e5554e;border-color:#ffffff;color:#fff;border-radius:3px;-moz-border-radius:3px;-webkit-border-radius:3px;\"><strong>READ ALSO: <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/how-to-deal-with-a-narcissistic-wife\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">How To Deal With A Narcissistic Wife<\/a><\/strong><\/div><\/div>\n<h3><strong>Enslavement Technique #2: Fractionation<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>The second technique I taught Lenny was even more powerful than emotional blackmail&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s a <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/mind-control-techniques\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Mind Control<\/a> technique called<strong> &#8220;Fractionation&#8221;<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>Fractionation is what we call a<strong><em> &#8220;cornerstone&#8221; <\/em><\/strong>principle in Shogun Method. All the other techniques are based on it.<\/p>\n<p>So, if you only had to learn one technique \u2013 <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">I\u2019d recommend you learn Fractionation<\/span>.<\/p>\n<p>Fractionation uses storytelling to put your woman into an emotional \u201ctrance.\u201d Then, it takes her out of it, and back into it, over and over.<\/p>\n<p>Fractionation works so well because of one reason&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><strong>It exploits a woman\u2019s natural weakness for emotional roller coasters. This weakness is embedded in every woman&#8217;s psyche.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The more she feels the ups-and-downs with you, the easier it is for you to <a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/how-to-be-dominant-in-a-relationship\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">control and dominate her<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>(It&#8217;s a female psychology flaw that you can, and should, exploit to your benefit.)<\/p>\n<p>Lenny used Fractionation to the hilt, and soon Fiona started showing the changes he wanted to see:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>She started showing genuine remorse for what she did<\/li>\n<li>She started following Lenny\u2019s lead in earnest<\/li>\n<li>She started respecting Lenny\u2019s absolute authority<\/li>\n<li>She started going far and wide to make up for the pain she caused Lenny and their family<\/li>\n<li>She started actively doing her part (and more) to make the marriage thrive<\/li>\n<li>And so much more<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>As a result, Lenny saved his marriage, and their relationship is now stronger than ever.<\/p>\n<p>Would you want the same for yourself?<\/p>\n<h2><strong>Now, It\u2019s Your Turn<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><strong>Look, here&#8217;s the deal.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve been cheated on by your wife or girlfriend&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>If you want her to get back in line&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>And if you want to save your relationship&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Then I invite you to take the first step today.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Master Fractionation by joining my Online Masterclass right now. <\/strong>Check it out below:<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-3611\" src=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/enslavement.png\" alt=\"Unrequited Love Sucks\" width=\"151\" height=\"234\" \/><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/masterclass\/\"><strong>Request Invite To Derek Rake&#8217;s Online Mind Control Masterclass<\/strong><\/a><\/h3>\n<p>Finally, remember&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Once your woman cheats on you, there\u2019s really only <strong>one <\/strong>way to save your relationship &#8211;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Make sure she doesn\u2019t cheat on you ever again.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>And Fractionation is your first step towards that goal.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/masterclass\/\">Join my Online Masterclass now.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Do it.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-165\" src=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/derek-rake-sig-60.png\" alt=\"Derek Rake\" width=\"167\" height=\"60\" \/><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/derekrake.com\/blog\/derek-rake-review\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Derek Rake, Shogun Method Founder<\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>PS: Questions? Comments? Leave them below.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Steps To Rebuilding Trust In A Relationship Ever got cheated on by your current wife or girlfriend? Truly, it\u2019s one of the most painful things a guy could ever experience. You love a woman, treat her well, work hard to meet her every need&#8230; &#8230;but in the end, she betrays your trust by sleeping with [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-5321","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-articles","7":"entry"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How To Rebuild Trust In A Relationship (Updated For 2018)<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"How do you work on trust in a relationship or a marriage? 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