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Warning: Everything You Know About Body Language Is WRONG!
Body language is often said to be a key aspect in dating and seduction.
Guess what - that’s VERY true. Mastering body language skills is truly essential in any guy’s ‘game’. But while body language is important, people have got misconceptions on how to use it.
The common thinking is that a guy should look out for the girl’s body language, and then react accordingly. That, my friend, is a totally wrong way to do it.
Why?
You see, if you only ‘react‘ to whatever signals that a woman send you, then you will always be one step behind.
The key here is to LEAD, and not to follow. If you are a mere follower, you will look doubtful and hesitant to the woman. There’s no need for me to convince you that these are sure attraction killers.
When she feels that you’re not very confident, then it’s effectively game over for you. You see - the only way to win in this game is to be congruent and authoritative.
An attractive, confident man does not “read” a woman’s body language and then figure out if she fancies him or not. No!
But wait…
I do NOT mean that body language is useless. It can be very useful - as long as you don’t use it ‘reactively’. You must ‘monitor’ her body language, but just to ensure that you are doing alright.
(This is especially important when you are using the “Pulling Her Into Your World” seduction technique - which I covered on page 34 of How To Seduce Out Of Your League)
For example, if she faces you totally, looks deep into your eyes and touches you, then you know that you’re fine. On the other hand, if she looks over your shoulder when talking, it might mean that you’re not doing that well.
In short, you have got to use body language as a ’signpost’ to know that you’re doing things right. You should NOT use it as a basis for your behavior, or for your ‘next move’. In fact, if you combine the power of body language with “Chase Reversal” techniques (tactics to get her to chase you instead - pages 45 to 50 of the How To Seduce Out Of Your League manual) then you will be virtually unstoppable.
© 2008 DerekRake.com and Zen & The Art of Seduction. Go to http://www.TheRakeLetter.com for a free trial subscription of The Rake Letter - the seduction community's premium e-newsletter featuring the best of the Zen Seduction techniques for free
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5 comments for “Warning: Everything You Know About Body Language Is WRONG!”
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hi derek my man.its all ways good to her from u,anyway i like the way u put the body lang thing.after reading it all am lefty with a qoution;how do i aract a woman the i meat nd have be come friends.
Well I do react to body language , but once in a while I change something in my body language and see if she follows…
also the thing about body language : it has to come natural !
John maambo :
been in your position , and I think it is almost impossible.
the only way it once worked for me was when i didn’t see her for a long time.And the next time we met , i ignored here a little in the beginning and by the time she was getting bored , i took my chance
Good luck !
Why thank you very much sir. I have been trying to say this to my friends and colleagues since forever. It’s about the possession of the lead. Women and men are locked in a constant battle for authority, fact of myth? MYTH! Unconfident men and women battle for possession of authority. Once you are confident and leading the way, she will be having to catch up, but you don’t want to go too far ahead to make her feel that you are out of her league. But what you want to do is be confident and lead the way at least 2 steps ahead of her. This way she won’t be able to catch up in one move, and you will always have room to adjust and maintain charge of the situation.
mmm i am a musician and i tend to move a lot my fingers you but is not because i m nervous is just something i have jeje!!!!you think that can disturb in an encounter with a girl???
Derek,
This tells me all I need to know about women’s body language, but do I use my own to my benefit?